The long absence

This blog of sorts has been, uh, nonexistent for two years. Most of the folks I have links to abandoned me, with good reason. But it is only now that I can write. You see, the blog was about two things: 1) the odd corners of fly fishing, and 2) tormenting my sister. She passed away in July 2010 from an aneurysm, and almost two years later I am still pissed off about it. She was young (40), with no family history and the week before had run one of those warrior-women steeplechase things. It was sudden, and by the time I got to the hospital the transplant team had been called in. She helped a lot of people but that somehow is still little consolation.

What made it all the worse is that our last fishing trip together was perfect. We headed up into the mountains of north Georgia to a stream that is known as a great place to catch stocked rainbows on corn, but it also harbors giant browns that rise to a green drake hatch. We stole a bunch of flies from her husband's fly box, hiked in to the really wild part, set up on two perfect riffles, and waited. As the sun set the coffin flies (the spinner phase) started to flit about. I had no luck other than a brief glimpse of a set of massive jaws that sheared my 3x tippet, took the fly and descended back into the stygian depths. But that was not why we were there.

The real reason we went all the way up into the wilderness was to see a phenomenon that I had heard about but never seen: the fairies and the twinkies. They are real, but it's not what you think. The fairies are a firefly, and the twinkies are sort of a glow-worm that resides in the wet places along the stream. I have not looked them up, and there were no twinkies streamside that night, but as the woods became dark the fairies came out with a vengeance. Now Michigan fireflies are pretty tame: they fly around and blink on and off with sort of a yellowish light. I have seen synchronized flashing, but rarely, and have never bothered to think about them very much. Georgia fireflies are different. They maintain a constant light (no flashing), the light is an ethereal blue-green, and they stay low over the ferns. At one point, there were hundreds of them streaming down a hillside, all no more than 2 or three feet above ground. If you did not maintain rational thought, you could drift into an observation of hundreds of little Tinkerbell like beings all headed right at you. They were everywhere, and it was beautiful. And really spooky.

But the best part of the night was still to come, because I knew that my sister had this inane phobia about bears. Once in Wyoming, she saw a herd of black angus cows moving down a hillside and thought they were all black bears trying to eat her. The cows got close enough so that no normal person could not perceive their platonic cow-ness, and her response at that point was to scream louder and burrow under the gear in the back of the jeep. So I waited until she brought up the inevitable as it became dark enough to turn on the headlamps. This was the moment I had been waiting for, and decided that her fear should be quelled by objective biological facts.

Julie: I hope that there aren't any bears around here.
Me: Well Julie, I googled Georgia bear densities and there are about 2 per square mile in suitable habitat. So we have hiked through the territory of only, say, 6 to 8 of them.
Julie: ^&#^&$(&&%%!!!
Me: Hey, I read a neat article about eastern cougar sightings. It seems that they may be recolonizing the appalachians. Western cats are moving into territories that have not been occupied for nearly a century.
Julie: ^&#^&$(&&%%!!!
Me: You don't need to be frightened. Bears forage constantly because they subsist on small prey. Large prey are rare in their diet.
Julie: ^&#^&$(&&%%!!!

This went on and on like the mighty Ganges until I thought she was going to clock me. Fortunately, we arrived back at the car and drove home sweaty and exhausted.
Damn, I miss her and I wish we had fished together more.
I did get her started, but distance and the usual constraints of modern life limited our trips together. And I will always remember her casting style that I described as "Sweetheart of the Rodeo".


The postscript to all this is that my Mom informed me that I was to lead her memorial service. Told her that I had no idea what to say. Her response was that I was a college professor and by definition always knew what to say. Among other things, I needed to write an obituary and put together a wee brochure for the guests. There was all the usual stuff you write, but the last page was blank and despite my Mom's confidence I truly knew not what to say there. I think I googled trout poems or something like that and stumbled across a poem by William Butler Yeats entitled "The Stolen Child", about a child who is taken by, of all things, the fairies. Aside from the relevance of the title, which pretty much described the situation to a T, I was struck by the last verse:

Where the wandering water gushes

From the hills above Glen-Car,

In pools among the rushes

That scarce could bathe a star,

We seek for slumbering trout

And whispering in their ears

Give them unquiet dreams;

Leaning softly out

From ferns that drop their tears

Over the young streams.

Come away, O human child!

To the waters and the wild

With a faery, hand in hand,

For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.

And when the previous verse mentioned trout, I knew that that poem was so going in. And I read it more often than I care to admit, and I would so take Yeats fly fishing if he were still around.

So, I knew that some day I would fire up this blog, but that I would have to write about this before I wrote anything else. But I just couldn't. It was too sad. It still is, but I had a moment of epiphany. I realized that if Julie found out that I had neglected a perfectly good fly fishing blog for this long because I was still moping about, she would be pissed off, and probably more so than when I was tormenting her about bears. I can just imagine the lecture, and she would probably have clocked me over this and the bear story.

It is time to move on, and no serious stuff. The next story will be the annual hunting installment, and I guarantee hilarity and mirth. It will be about how the worst deer hunter in the world takes up muzzleloading.